Back to Center: I want to take our family's health back into our own hands

Sarah Perron

January 2, 2023

The purpose of the “Back to Center” advice column is to provide perspectives for personal realignment and empowered living in these tyrannical times. Sarah encourages you to reach out to her with requests for advice about self-development and emotional and mental well-being. Please send your questions to advice@aflds.org. Anonymous and secure. Looking forward to hearing from you!

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There’s a family in our church whose young son was recently found to have a brain tumor. It's been a very scary time for them. The tumor was successfully removed in surgery, thank God — but it sounds like the next step is for him to be treated with chemotherapy and radiation. When I heard that, my heart just sank. I’m no medical expert at all, but my gut feeling is that there has to be a better way. Chemo and radiation are going to make this kid so sick.

I’ve done some reading and learning in the past about a number of people who have successfully beat cancer through natural methods. Making big changes to their diet and lifestyle made the cancer totally disappear! I so want to share this information with my friends for their son, but I’m also feeling hesitant, kind of like, “Who am I? Is it my place to do this?” I want to be very sensitive to what they’re going through and not just throw advice at them.

Another thing that’s hanging me up is I’ve got this nagging thought that maybe this tumor could have been caused by the COVID shots. I’m pretty sure their whole family got the injections. If that's the case, I have no idea if the natural healing methods I want to suggest would be helpful. The “vaccine” seems like a whole other thing. I’m not sure what to do next. How can I be most helpful to my friends right now?

I'm so sorry to hear about what this family is going through. There are no words for the pain of seeing a child experience serious illness. I can hear your deep concern and heartfelt longing to help.

Before anything else, the number one most powerful thing you can do right now is to simply be there for your friends. You can tell them you're praying for them and their son, visit them in the hospital or at home, and let them know they can call you if they ever just need a friend to talk to. Ask them what they need. Maybe you can help coordinate a meal train in your church for them, put together a care package for their son with fun toys and books, and so on. Your love and attention will make a world of difference for your friends as they go through this intense time.

With that as your foundation, let's move into the health advice part. It sounds like you are already inclined to approach this situation with sensitivity, which is wonderful. You're not letting your concern over this boy's treatment path overrun the need to interact respectfully with his parents.

There is a very simple, yet profound approach I encourage you to consider taking with your friends — that is to seek permission. You have this information about natural healing that you'd love to share with them. What would it be like if you explained a bit about it — just a little background info, no persuasion — and then asked if they'd like to see it or hear more about it?

It sounds so easy, right? And it is, but it has some incredibly powerful effects. Seeking another person's permission makes them feel safe, respected, and seen. Rather than just “throwing advice” at them, as you said, it shows them you value their right to make their own choices, and indicates that you believe they are capable of making good choices that are right for them. You're not there to impose anything upon them, but to truly help and support, if that's something they want. It's a true act of service, offered in humility.

When you come to another person in this way, they will usually be much more open to hearing what you want to share. And for you, I believe it will get rid of that question you have about whether it's your place to offer this information or not, because your friends will tell you. You're putting the decision in their hands.

And then of course, you have to leave it in their hands, whatever they decide to do next. If they say they're not interested in hearing you out, or if they do listen but still decide to go with the chemotherapy and radiation, it will be very important to hold onto that respect and let them make their own decision. Your job is to offer the information, not to try to control the outcome.

As to whether this boy's tumor is linked to the COVID injection — we just don't know. We are seeing the injections wreak serious havoc on health around the world right now, but they're not necessarily the cause of every illness. I don't think you need to feel like you have all the answers. What you can do is to simply offer what you do know, and see where they take it from there.

Sending prayers for this boy's complete healing, whatever the path!

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I recently read your article about herbal medicine on the Frontline News site. Learning from what was written there has been another step on the journey I’ve been on the last few years of redefining my reality, of sorting out truth from lies. I was blown away to learn that the widespread wisdom of herbal medicine was only abandoned within the last few generations!

To me, having grown up with the medical system, it seemed like that’s all that’s ever been, that that’s what is “normal” — you have a headache, you take a pill. Now, because of COVID, I’m totally rethinking everything, because I feel like I can’t trust anything that comes out of the medical system. This includes the “traditional” childhood vaccines for my kids. I'm feeling overwhelmed that what I believed for so much of my life turned out to be harmful lies, in a system that is more about profits and control than real care for people.

Where do I go from here? I want to take our family’s health back into our own hands, but at the same time, I feel unsure about my own abilities and judgments. What if I make the wrong decision for a sick child of mine? And how do I reprogram my indoctrinated brain to believe that I don’t need to run to the doctor for every little thing — that I really could learn to treat some things naturally at home — that vaccines for my kids aren’t necessarily the be-all, end-all way to keep them healthy, and so on? How do I escape the “matrix” for good?

Thank you so much for writing in. I want to start off by acknowledging that what you are doing right now is massive. You've recognized that your long-held beliefs about healthcare aren't as black-and-white as you once thought, and instead of fearfully turning a blind eye, you're actively choosing to find a new way forward. That takes real courage and integrity!

At the same time, I hear the tension you're feeling in this transition. Let's take a look at this together.

On the mindset level: Remember that much of the messaging that comes out of the medical system and from Big Pharma is meant to make us feel disempowered, dependent, and fearful. We need the experts to tell us what is best for us, or we need that drug in order to be healthy. The truth is we can learn to be more aware of our bodies, in tune with our needs, and solve many of our problems simply and naturally through herbal remedies. How empowering is that?

For you, a key part of this journey will be to build up your own self-confidence to stand in this empowerment. You can make a change. You can learn to do this. As you said yourself, people treated their health issues naturally for thousands of years. It's only within the last few generations that we've stepped away from that path. It is possible to return.

When it comes to your mindset, what are the false beliefs that have taken root within you about health (example: “I need someone else to tell me what's best for my body”)? If you can spot them, bring them into the light by writing them down. Then for each one, write down a new belief you'd like to replace it with (example: “I can learn to better understand what my body needs”). Actively working to transform the beliefs that are holding you back will help you reshape your entire experience.

What are some other practical ways to build up that confidence?

Sometimes when we want to make a big change in life, we think we have to do it all at once. You might feel like you need to shift overnight from being a mother who takes her children to the doctor frequently to one who knows how to confidently treat every ailment with herbal remedies at home. That pressure we put on ourselves to change instantly on a grand scale can often result in big-time overwhelm. Instead, what could you do to start small? What piece of information would you like to learn as a first step? For example, you might choose to learn about making herbal infusions to help keep your family healthier. It's super easy and beneficial. Once you've got that down, you can move to something else. It will all add up over time.

Also remember that you're not alone. If you're feeling lost as to how to handle a health issue, there are people you can consult. Find out more about the range of healthcare providers in your area, including alternative medicine. There may even be a skilled herbalist in your community! You may also be able to connect with others online who can help you learn. Talk to them, and draw on their expertise to help figure out the best solution, and then take what you've learned through that experience forward with you.

It's no small thing to forge a new way of being for yourself. Take it slow and easy, and with time you'll see your confidence grow. All the best!

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Sarah encourages you to reach out to her with requests for advice! Please send your questions to advice@aflds.org. Anonymous and secure.

Sarah Perron is a Certified Transformational Life Coach. Her passion is to help people create a powerful vision for their lives, identify and eliminate anything that holds them back, and step into their own unique greatness and mission in the world. She believes deeply in the power of coaching to bring fresh perspectives, ideas, and motivation to anyone who wants to thrive in life. Sarah works with clients one-on-one and in group coaching programs and presents exciting workshops on self-development topics. You can follow her on her YouTube channel Find Your Fire.

You are invited to book a complimentary coaching call with Sarah! Please visit https://calendly.com/sarahperroncoaching/45min to choose a time that's convenient for you. She looks forward to meeting you!